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The Sermon on Capitol Hill

The Messiah went forth among the people. He had only his waffle, with which He wished to be left alone. But seeing the people in their plenitude, the Messiah multiplied the waffles and the cigarettes, and those in Congress - His disciples - went forth with baskets of the new-found bounty.

But verily the syrup did not increase, as He needed something more to promise the faithful in four years hence.

A lonely woman came to the Messiah and spoke. “I want waffles”.

He placed his hand on her head, as if to cast out demons, and said, “And verily you shall have them, my child, and they shall be called ’stimulus’ after the ancient god of graft.” The woman went forth with her waffles. And the Messiah saw that it was good, and said it was good, and it was good…

This entry was posted on Saturday, January 17th, 2009 at 12:13 pm and is filed under Personal, Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

13 Comments - Join in the conversation below »

  1. Absolutely brilliant.

    Comment by Michelle Lancaster — January 17, 2009 @ 12:15 pm

  2. Yet the multitudes in their unfailing ingratitude did spurn those cigarettes for they where menthol and asked for blueberries on those waffles which the messiah could not produce.

    Comment by James Cohen — January 17, 2009 @ 12:44 pm

  3. HAAAAAAAAA! *clap*clap*clap*clap*clap*

    Comment by SondraK — January 17, 2009 @ 12:58 pm

  4. NICE!
    Oh the snark to come….

    Comment by Melissa In Texas — January 17, 2009 @ 1:44 pm

  5. Yea, verily.

    Comment by Vaultenblogger — January 17, 2009 @ 1:54 pm

  6. A cheap Parody of his former self. This is not the Obama I knew.

    Comment by btenney — January 17, 2009 @ 2:36 pm

  7. Why do I hear Porky Pig in the background and wanna call’im a liar for yea, *that’s [not] all folks!*

    Comment by forest hunter — January 17, 2009 @ 3:14 pm

  8. Is the Mighty O waffling already? He hasn’t even taken office.

    Comment by Mohammed The Teddy Bear — January 17, 2009 @ 4:14 pm

  9. I am inspired to produce my own ovation to the Obamessiah!

    Comment by The Watcher — January 17, 2009 @ 4:36 pm

  10. Wait hold on, is the former Obama the one who did the big Greek god coronation as Democratic candidate? Cause it looks exactly like the old Obama we all saw there.

    Comment by James Cohen — January 17, 2009 @ 4:54 pm

  11. “I hear Porky Pig in the background”

    And Foghorn Leghorn is the Veep.

    Comment by Bob1 — January 17, 2009 @ 5:57 pm

  12. BRAVO!!!!

    Comment by Stepperg — January 17, 2009 @ 6:48 pm

  13. [...] SERMON ON THE HILL– “The Messiah went forth among the people. He had only his waffle, with which He wished [...]

    Pingback by Steynian 311 « Free Canuckistan! — January 17, 2009 @ 8:45 pm

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