I just want to give a special shoutout to pal Mark Steyn for not having written about them. I couldn’t handle the jealousy and rejection. Thanks, babe.

In other news, “breasts” will now often be referred to here as “blogettes”.

Save the blogettes!

To Shop for the Cause at Amazon!

Yes, I’ve been under the weather and out of the loop when it comes to reminding you to donate money this October to a worthy cause - Breast Cancer Research.

But Meghan McCain jugged - er, jogged - my memory.

So check out this Amazon link to find a myriad of products in all price ranges that go to support various breast cancer charities. There’s something for everyone!

Also, thanks to noted breast-lover RS McCain, from whose site I swiped the photo that Her Beastiness has already deleted from Twitpic. Dear Meghan - you can’t erase the Internet.

John Mayer, a singer with a lovely voice, was asked his opinion on politics and health care. His perfect answer?

Have you ever heard me play guitar? I’m really fucking good. You know what I’m bad at? Answering questions about public health care. This is not in my wheelhouse. Do you have any questions about music?

Brilliant. He has risen in my esteem.

Via Big Hollywood

I have heard reports from Kandahar that there is a sign on the Tim Hortons trailer saying that there is a supply issue. No doughnuts.

At the present time, there is no word on availability of coffee supply. No one has yet been denied any coffee.

You may guffaw that what I’ve told you here isn’t important. You are an asshole for that.

In WWII, women powdered their legs and drew lines up the back of their calves, all because our men serving overseas needed stocking silk for their parachutes.

It’s bad enough that Canada has to rent planes from the Russians to get our stuff overseas to those serving in Afghanistan. It’s also bad enough that if we need to get something there quickly, we send it via the Americans (that’s what I do).

The idea of our soldiers going without the coffee and doughnuts we all rallied to send over there - you may remember Tim’s was initially reluctant to open up shop in a war zone, those pussies - is distasteful. Let’s get ‘em their goddam Timbits.

Who can we call about this?

Tim Hortons Head Office

874 Sinclair Road
Oakville, ON L6K 2Y1
Tel: (905) 845-6511
Fax: (905) 845-0265

Defence Minister Peter Mackay

509s Center Block
House of Commons
Ottawa, Ontario
K1A 0A6

Mackap@parl.gc.ca
613-992-6022

Do what you can. It may seem unimportant to you & I, but it’s important to them. Thanks.

Note. For those of you with either a) no sense of humor, or b) humor, but are totally scared of the shit that comes out of my mouth, this post is FUNNY. Funny, ok? Written in jest. Relax. Have a TicTac.

The last thing I remember was my third martini at my birthday party on October 2. This party was attended by dear friend Josephine and her hubby Dutch, who gave me a small Moleskine notebook. Moleskines are famous for having been used by the likes of Vincent Van Gogh, who famously cut off his ear and then shot himself, and Ernest Hemingway, who blew his brains out and kicked off a string of suicides in the Hemingway family that probably isn’t over yet. For all I know, Hunter S. Thompson used one for his (pre-blog era) “Gonzo Journalism”. Thompsons’s ashes - the remains of his self-inflicted gunshot wound - were shot out of a cannon, as per his request, in 2005.

Today Josephine writes on Lumpy of children’s author Robert Munsch and his mental illness and thoughts of suicide. Though her article makes no mention of his choice of notebook to write in, I’m seeing a pattern here.

Geez, Josephine!I can take a hint!

Ok, off to write something more profound than this drivel.

My typing is still recovering from the week that was. So here’s a vlog instead. Yes, I’m well aware that I have a great face for radio.

Because everyone needs a break now and then.

Thanks to all those of you who have called and left messages. Thanks and apologies to Josephine and Dutch, who I must have scared the shit out of. I hope I didn’t make you too late.

I’m not going to thank whoever was pounding on my door and shouting my name earlier today, because that was just rude.

I am taking some off the grid, underground time. If any of you reading this have posting privileges, do feel free to use them.

And everyone, please remember to do a little something to advance the cause of Breast Cancer Research this month.

I’m going back to bed.

Products that donate to breast cancer research:

Travel mug. Trudeau Cool Down Polycarbonate Hydration 24-Ounce Bottle, Breast Cancer Awareness, Pink

24 oz bottle. $9.99. 5% of money goes to BCRF

The CHRC has mounted a Kamikaze effort to defend the odius Section 13 (1). It is imperative that we ask those organizations who support 13 (1)’s repeal to seek Intervenor Status in the upcoming judicial review of Warman v. Lemire .

Do your bit, write the organizations listed below, where appropriate ask if they plan to seek official status at the judicial review, offer to assist if at all possible with a donation. Nag Harper, nag Nicholson nag your MP, nag the members of the Justice Committee. Send a letter to the editor of your local daily, or write your favourite columnist.

This is your fight, take a swing and make it count for Free Speech. Let our opponents know that we will not negotiate and we will not beg for what is rightfully ours.

Canadian Civil Liberties Association
506 – 360 Bloor Street West
Toronto, ON M5S 1X1
Phone: 416-363-0321
Fax: 416-861-1291
email: mail@ccla.org

BC Civil Liberties Association
550 - 1188 West Georgia Street
Vancouver, BC V6E 4A2
Tel: 604.687.2919
Fax: 604.687.3045
Email: info@bccla.org

The Canadian Association of Journalists
Algonquin College
1385 Woodroffe Avenue, B224
Ottawa, ON K2G 1V8
Telephone 613-526-8061
Fax: 613-521-3904

Catholic Civil Rights League
120 Eglinton Ave. East, Suite 500
Toronto, ON
M4P 1E2
Tel: 416-466-8244
email:ccrl@ccrl.ca

Catholic Womens League of Canada
C-702 Scotland Avenue
Winnipeg, Manitoba R3M 1X5
National Office Telephone and Facsimile
Telephone: (204) 927-2310
Toll-free: (888) 656-4040
Facsimile: (204) 927-2321
Toll-free Facsimile: (888) 831-9507
E-mail: national@cwl.ca

Egale Canada
By Phone: (613) 230-1043,(888) 204-7777
By Fax: (416) 642-6435
By Email: egale.canada@egale.ca

PEN Canada
24 Ryerson Ave., Suite 301
Toronto ON M5T 2P3
Phone: 416 703 8448
Fax: 416 703 3870
Email: queries@pencanada.ca

Electronic Frontier Canada, Inc.
20 Richmond Avenue
Kitchener, Ontario
N2G 1Y9
…

People to Nag:

Conservative Party of Canada
#1204 - 130 Albert Street
Ottawa, Ontario
K1P 5G4

Toll free: (866) 808-8407
Phone: (613) 755-2000
Fax at: (613) 755-2001

Prime Minister Harper - HarpeS@parl.gc.ca , pm@pm.gc.ca

Rob Nicholson - Nicholson.R@parl.gc.ca

Justice Committee

Conservative MP’s
…

People to send persuasive but non-threatening letters to:

Canadian Human Rights Commission
344 Slater Street, 8th Floor,
Ottawa, Ontario K1A 1E1,
CanadaTelephone: (613) 995-1151
Toll Free: 1-888-214-1090
TTY: 1-888-643-3304
Fax: (613) 996-9661

Canadian Human Rights Tribunal
160 Elgin Street, 11th Floor
Ottawa, Ontario K1A 1J4
Telephone: (613) 995-1707
TTY: (613) 947-1070
Fax: (613) 995-3484
E-mail: registrar@chrt-tcdp.gc.ca

Canadian Arab Federation
1057 McNicoll Avenue
Toronto, Ontario,
Canada M1W 3W6
T: (416) 493-8635 or 1-866-886-4675
F: (416) 493-9239
E: info@caf.ca

Canadian Islamic Congress
Mrs. Wahida Valiante
Chair & National President
(905) 771-1023
(Cell) 647 802 8024
e-mail:cicnp@canadianislamiccongress.com

Canadian Jewish Congress
National Office
100 Sparks Street, Suite 650
Ottawa, Ontario, K1P 5B7
canadianjewishcongress@cjc.ca
Phone: (613) 233-8703
Fax: (613) 233-8748

B’nai Brith
15 Hove Street
Toronto, Ontario M3H 4Y8
Tel.: (416) 633-6224
Fax : (416) 630-2159
e-mail: mailto:bnb@bnaibrith.ca
or
Michael Mostyn
National Director of Public Affairs
Fuller Bldg. 212-75
Albert Street
Ottawa, Ontario, K1P 5E7
Tel.: (613) 598-0060
Fax: (613) 598-0059
e-mail: ParliamentHill@bnaibrith.ca

There is a whole host of things for sale in October and throughout the year that help pay for and promote breast cancer research. Usually these items are pink, which rocks my world, because I’m a pink junkie. My laptop, camera, iPod, cowboy boots and even my pearls are all pink. my BlackBerry Pearl from Telus (Canada) is pink, and a portion of the proceeds went to breast cancer research.

The downside to my charming pink computer is that it’s HUGE. Seriously, grossly large. Weighs as much as a two-year-old, which is a joy for lugging around airports. Mostly when I carry the damn thing, I have hot fantasies about owning a Mac Book Air. I have no idea why I felt driven to buy the 17″ instead of the 15″, but whatever.  I digress… This unfortunately means that I can’t buy pretty and stylish laptop bags. I have to have monstrous, ugly vinyl/canvas things that look like they were designed for war. I can’t have something like this:

Click picture for more info

Click the picture to be taken to Amazon. 10% of the sale of this bag ($129.99, includes shipping) goes to Susan G. Komen for the Cure. Compared to similar bags from Spade or Coach, this bag is not only an inexpensive value, but promotes a great cause. Fits “normal” sized laptops, netbooks and tablets up to 15.2″.

Save the ta-tas! And carry your laptop in a good-looking, sturdy conversation-starter!

*Yes, I know I’m wearing purple in that image and not pink. Shut up. Since when did you people start complaining about breasts, anyway?

The screaming harpie of Canadian cultural handouts - Margaret Atwood - is upset because British Columbia is cutting arts funding to pay for the Olympic Albatross that hangs from the collective necks of the Canadian taxpayer.

Members of Canada’s arts elite are banding together to mount a high-level fight against recently announced cuts to arts funding in British Columbia.

Margaret Atwood, Douglas Coupland and Sarah McLachlan are among the artists named in a campaign being launched today. Organizers are hoping to use the star power to reverse what they say are devastating cuts to arts and culture funding.

“We felt these cuts were so outrageous that we were going to be able to get everybody instantly on side,” said Lindsay Brown of Stop B.C. Arts Cuts. “Everybody I asked said yes.”

Ok, so the artistes are upset about arts cuts. Fair enough. But may I remind you of this?

Upwards of 2,500 patients waiting for surgery for everything from blocked arteries to cancer to hernias will find their elective surgeries postponed during the 2010 Winter Olympics.

In a pair of decisions just now becoming public, the Vancouver Coastal and Fraser Health Authorities say they have decided to cut by 35 per cent the number of elective surgeries performed over a one-month period in February and March, 2010.

If The Atwood and other sub-par Canadian artists actually gave a damn about the people of the country, they would have either shut up entirely, or protested cutting surgeries instead of grants for bad poetry and boring paintings.

But, alas…

Ms. Atwood finds it maddening. “Why is the B.C. government cutting the throat of B.C.’s economy and its creative future in this short-sighted and frankly really dumb way?” she e-mailed The Globe and Mail yesterday.

The throat of the economy? Seriously? How does this woman look at herself every morning?

Thanks to @AshSaysSo on Twitter for the title idea.

Today, help a sister out.

Every woman over the age of 40 should get a yearly mammogram. They’re painful, but not painfully expensive. Unfortunately, not every woman can afford one. It’s not one of those things that should be put off.

National Breast Cancer Foundation (NBCF) offers us the opportunity to donate mammograms to those who need them and can’t afford them.

Listen up conservatives! This is a good deed! If enough people do good deeds like this, then the government has no reason to pass socialized medicine. Think about it!

Click here to donate a mammogram to someone who needs one. Looking out for each other. It’s what we do.