Marriages that are arranged by someone else may not necessarily end in disaster but love marriages do not guarantee success either. However in love marriages you know only the good side of the other half and in arranged marriages you get to know both sides of your other half in the six months after the wedding. Success of marriage is not only based on love, there are many factors that support the success of marriages such as love, care, support, financial resources, ambition, love for children, support of the kids welfare, give and take, sacrifices, commitments, communication, nature, and above all satisfaction of sexual needs.
Do arranged marriages work? This is not a debatable and controversial issue. This is an issue which is dealt with and looked at from different angles in different parts of the world this may involve faith, culture, colour, languages, food, the list can go on…
We have seen in the past numbers of arranged marriages failed yet we have also witnessed large volumes of marriages which have been fine. Just because someone has got married by their own choice success will not be guaranteed. There are problems in every marriage which arise after some time; two individuals living together in the same house, same room, same bed, sharing almost everything will have some issues regardless of whether your marriage was a love marriage or arranged.
Do love marriages have a better chance of success? Well in love marriages you know a bit about your other half but that does not mean you know the person, you may know the good side of the person but may not have experienced the other side. You have seen the best of everything but you may not have seen the ugly side. This does not mean you had not seen or you missed the other side, in fact there might not be an ugly side, yet it is a risk and then you have no one to blame.
In arranged marriages you have not seen any side of the person. If you are lucky enough to have all you want in your partner then you are laughing all the way to bed! Or you will see the other side or should I say both sides of the person in six months then you will make a decision for rest of your married life.
In my opinion the majority of marriages in the world are arranged, when marriages are arranged they take many things into consideration: food, languages, culture, faith and a lot more. In love marriages it’s no different than this. Have you ever come across couples who have NO common language?
Love starts at any time after 15 years of age. ‘Let’s go to the University of London, you will find girls going out with boyfriends at the weekends and evenings, you will find pairs of Indian boys and Indian girls, Chinese boys and Chinese girls, English boys and English girls and in some cases you will find mixed-race couples. Even in these relationships you will find many things in common like interests, food, culture and language. It is very unlikely that you will find Chinese girls with no English at all going out with Indian boys, or any other boys than Chinese. Why? The problem of communication is what we have to consider in an arranged match for life in love marriages taking everything including food and like dislike every thing in consideration called arranged marriages the only difference is that in a love marriage you have chosen yourself and in an arranged marriage someone has chosen for you.
Regardless of whether marriages are loved or arranged the most important thing is it works for life and it requires lots of understanding, care, support and help to each other and this required in both arranged or love marriages.