Senator Barbara Mikulski (D-MD) gave a speech on the senate floor yesterday to push for “Rosa’s Law”. Rosa’s law is a piece of legislation that mandate the phrase “mentally disabled” be used in place of “mentally retarded” when referring to such citizens on health and education paperwork.

“In changing the language, we believe it will be the start of new attitudes towards people with intellectual disabilities.”

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This madness must end. America is in the middle of two strenuous wars, and we have an economy on the brink of total collapse, yet we have a senator who seems preoccupied with the use of a certain descriptor used in government documentation. Yet again, another bleeding heart Democrat who is more concerned with feeling good, rather than doing good for the nation as a whole.

Now, before I get chastised for being heartless by those who would accuse me of standing in the way of a little girl’s supposed happiness, I would like to disclose the following:

I am physically disabled. I have Cerebral Palsy, which prevents me from walking without the assistance of an orthopedic device or another person. I have been called many things, such as “disabled”, “differently-abled”, “handicapped”, “handi-capable”, “crippled”, and a few other words along the way that can’t be shared here.

Guess what?

In spite of all the labels that have been assigned to me and others like me, one thing has remained constant:

My condition has never changed. People need to learn that while words do have meaning, which is important, context is also a key component in this equation. For instance, “retard” means to slow or hinder. It does not mean “stupid”, and the modifiers “mental” or “mentally” refers to the type of impediment. It is not, in and of itself, an attempt at ridicule or character assassination. Referring to someone as “mentally retarded” in official paperwork is not the same as yelling it in anger toward the person who cut you off at the intersection. It just isn’t. The words have a benign meaning. It’s the context in which they are used that can change them.

Quite frankly, when one looks at this objectively, this proposed law is nothing more than a time wasting exercise by those in our legislature, which will change nothing, except maybe making a few self-loathers feel better about themselves.

For the Record, the namesake of this legislation, Rosa Marcellino, has Down’s syndrome. She is, for all intents and purposes, mentally retarded. She is also 7 years old. With that in mind, one could probably say with a high degree of certainty that Rosa has no interest in official health and education paperwork at this point in her life. So, it stands to reason that this crusade was most likely started by a family member looking for attention, and Rosa is to be used as a face for it.

Honestly, that is just sad.

More than that, has anyone thought of the road this could lead us down? This is one step away from thought policing. How long will it be before legislation is introduced which will prevent us from saying certain words? It may very well be just around the corner. Such measures may never pass, but the mere possibility of such things being proposed should frighten any freedom-loving American.

We should be more concerned with today’s truly pressing matters. There are circumstances today which threaten our very way of life, yet some of our legislative officials seemed more concerned with how you feel, and more importantly, how they feel about themselves. The future of America is too important. We shouldn’t be wasting time on this drivel.

Words are just words. The only powers they have to offend are the ones that we decide to give them.

Conrad Black was sentenced. Robert Pickton is guilty - but not guilty enough. Churches getting shot up in Colorado. Busy weekend!

The point of a political blog is to stay current, stay on top of the news, and opine on damn near everything. Sometimes, though, all you really want to think about is this.

Sorry.

Girls with pearls sometimes need a little pick-me-up, and we head off to the spa. In the past few months I’ve had the chance to sample several - some here in Toronto, and another way out in the South Pacific.

RightGirl gets her waxing done at The Ten Spot on Queen. Aside from the agony they inflict on my more sensitive areas, they do a great eyebrow job, too. Thursday nights they serve martinis with their pedicures, and they have a very funky west-end atmosphere. Clean, friendly, hip and urban. A girl party. Result: I had my ass glued shut by wax.

Last weekend I joined a friend at Body Blitz at Adelaide and Portland. While she was getting a massage, I had my body scrubbed with sea salt with herbs and oil to slough off a peeling sunburn. Mmmmm, bliss. I was given a disposable thong to wear (one size fits all, even my ample bottom!), scrubbed from head to toe, hosed down like a classic automobile, then moisturized till I was as soft as a baby. It’s clothing optional in the pools, since it’s a women only facility. The ambiance is “downtown” and has a warehouse-y feel to it, but still manages to be relaxing. Really, you haven’t lived till you’ve relaxed in a cup of warm tea (part of their therapeutic water treatment circuit). No, really. The facilities are great, with fully stocked beauty bars for post-shower freshening up. Hair dryers, q-tips, and spray-on deodorant. There are also plastic baggies for you to put wet swimwear in, which I’ve never seen anywhere else and truly appreciated. They have a “no gratuity policy”, which takes the guesswork out of things at the end of your treatment. You pay in advance, and leave when you’re done. No fuss, no muss. One strange thing I discovered though was the effect of the concrete floor on my flip-flops. They suctioned, and I couldn’t lift my feet! Even in the shower! But I had a great time, and I will return. Kim did my scrub, and was delightful. Result: I got great rocks of sea salt stuck in the crack of my ass.

The Elmwood Spa in Toronto (on Elm Street, natch) is a place I’ve been to a few times, including this evening for a facial. They seem to be undergoing perpetual renovations, and some areas are grotty and “under construction”, but there is still high-end curb appeal to this place. The women’s locker room has been re-done, and is gorgeous. Unfortunately, the private women’s steam and whirlpool are “out of service”. However I seemed to have the water therapies section to myself, and I enjoyed relaxing in the hot tub and splashing in the pool. I went there for a pre-Christmas pedicure, courtesy of my bosses who gave me a gift card. A pedicure at the Elmwood is cleaner than you will get from many places. All tools are sterilized in an autoclave between guests, and you are given your chosen bottle of nail polish, your pumice, your buffer and your orange stick to take home for touch-ups. Tonight I received one of the best facials I’ve ever had from Ani. Despite the extraction process, I have no red marks on my sensitive face. While the steam was on my face, she gave me a foot massage (how’s that for service!?). My only complaint would be that the music was too high and the temperature too low in the facial room. Their beauty bar wasn’t as well stocked as that of Body Blitz (great shampoo in the showers, but how about some deodorant for when I get out?), and given that swimwear is mandatory, those little baggies would have been nice. Thankfully I discovered a stash of plastic bags for sanitary purposes, and used one of those. I purchased cleanser on my way out, and their prices for products are very reasonable. Result: nothing in the crack of my ass (which is good, since I was there for a facial).

If money is no object in life, get your ass on a plane to Hawaii. Luxury is an understatement at the Ihilani. On the far flung South West cost of Oahu (as far away from the chaos of Honolulu and Waikiki as you can get without getting wet), in Ko’olina, is the JW Marriott Resort and Spa. It’s where I spent my first Hawaiian night back in April, and at $400/night, I’m glad I only had to stay the one! I could wax poetic, writing sonnets about Ko’olina and the beaches and the golf course and the restaurant (Roy’s), but I will try to focus just on the spa. My first trip to the spa was for a massage I booked on short notice. There is a men’s section and a women’s section, so swimsuits are optional in the hot tub, steam and sauna. There are indoor and outdoor lounges, with wicker chaises, tea and plenty of icy lemon water. A 20% gratuity is included in the price of each treatment. My masseuse, Ruby, had the most wonderful hands; a cross between a butcher and an angel. By the time she was finished working those travel knots out of me, I was ready to propose. Because of a sunburn I had got on the beach that morning, Ruby suggested I book an appointment to return the next day for a Cooling Ti-Leaf Wrap, which I did. Bobbi delivered that particular aloe-and-green-tea treatment, which did indeed take the fever out of my skin. Result: When I stood up from the table, there was a tea leaf stuck in the crack of my ass.

And now, my best kept beauty secret. How does RightGirl always manage to have such perfect manicure and pedicure? She must spend a fortune! Thankfully, I don’t have to. For $35, Time for Nails will give you a fast-paced mani & pedi. The stereotypical Asian nail bar of indentured servitude, these ladies ROCK when it comes to giving great hands & feet. If you go mid-day it isn’t so chaotic. But if you go at 5pm on a Friday, as I did today, it’s a sardine can crossed with the henhouse babble of foreign tongue. They do the most awesome BioSculpt Gel nails, which I had refilled today. More expensive than a regular manicure, the gels run $45 for a full set and $35 for a fill. Totally worth it though. No chipping, no cracking - they can even withstand clumsiness and a staple-removing office environment.

This girl with pearls is sleepy now, and heading off to bed. Beauty is hard work!